2013 Concession Letters For Posterity
Nice shot, Rook.
Like Mark, I am married to a very lucky Ann. Also like Mark,
I have lost every Smackdown in which I have participated. I
lost the first to Wayne "Big Burrito" Simmons back before
the turn of the century, and I have lost afresh every spring
For the record, I am completely OK being the guy with the
target on my back. Each of you --27 humans, my brother Rand,
and an alleged dog--brings what passes for your A game. So
far, it has worked.
But I hear the desperation in your voices, and I hear the
pleas to the basketball gods to continue the streak. I hear
it all, and I smile, because I know that my time is coming.
Ann, while champion, you should be sure to visit with Mike
(who won in 2012 but lost to me this year), Aron (same in
2011) and Tifani (same in 2010). They can fill you in on the
temporary nature of your glory. Eventually, inevitably, I
And Rook--if you have the guts to play again, your
concession letter will be especially satisfying.
Enjoy it now, Ann. Congratulations.
Concession from one powerful woman to another.
I bow to you in your greatness, and your modesty. Although I for one don't find modesty all that helpful in the cutthroat world of college basketball, free-lance cello, or pretty much in anything at all, I can see that you are setting yourself up to really smack the field next year, and perhaps then your pretty white gloves will be set aside..? It's more fun that way, and the boys will really be annoyed if you smack 'em again next year.
While Derek may have some crumb of solace in the fact that he finished above previous winners of the past few years, I have to burst his bubble. If you aren't going to take the whole thing, you may as well boost him up from time to time, make him think it's within his reach; that Charlie Brown could get the cute red haired girl, that Coyote CAN catch the Road Runner, that West Coast will some day be a power again in basketball (oh wait, I forget myself, strike that one)...only to smack him down to the 20's in the standings the very next year. Why? Because Charlie Brown ALWAYS gets the rock, that's why.
Enjoy your glory, your domination, but...watch your back.
Sincerely yours in my foolish optimism that smart guys can win most of the time,
Although I finished a respectable 4th place, I still got
smack downed by Ann's greatest. I spent days reviewing the
best research on chaos theory, but none of the theorems
could explain her greatness. All of us are just feeling
blessed to be in the same bracket as Ann and to watch her
ability with the bracket. Its something we will tell our
kids and grand kids about I am sure.
That being said, Rock Chalk Jayhawk and wait 'til next year!
Oh the humanity!
My goals this year were humble: Just finish above the
Derek-doza line. But, I couldn't even manage that. Alas,
next year I'll have to aim even lower. Will Slim the Dog be
To Ann: I salute you. I have been a Smackdown participant
for at least 12 years. I have never won. I don't think
I've ever even come in second. I am the Chicago Cubs of the
Smackdown. You are the Florida Marlins. Just don't sell
off your team to make a quick buck. (Incidentally, Derek is
the Montreal Expos).
Thank you to Rand for coordinating the ever-growing
Smackdown yet again. You are a credit to your family (it's
good that one of the Simmons brothers can be).
To every one else, farewell until next March!
Paul "I should have aimed lower" Smith
To you, Ann, I concede. If someone had to beat me, I'm glad
it wasn't Derek. Clearly, we are all worse than you, but
as long as I'm better than Derek, I'll be happy.
Until next year.
I bow down to my new Smackdown Overlady. She had us all
beaten after the first round. And by "us" I mean Derek. She
beat him like it was her job. Well done!
My only consolation is that I beat Mr. Thummel and the dog.
Mike "2012 Smackdown Champ" Chastain
I bow to your infinite basketball wisdom. You have proven that feeling and whimsy is far superior than statistical analysis. I am proud to concede to such an amazing winner. I bet next year they "forget" to ask you to participate. Lol.
My deepest pain in this small-town is that I fell below the Derek line. I am not sure I can come back from such disgrace.
We'll see next year.
Lisa "not looking back" Heston
Ann, you bested me this year. Congrats.
Derek, you finished well ahead of me - but, so did most
I beat the dog - that is my positive take-away upon which I
rebuild for next year.
Concession Time to my wife, Ann
First of all, I bow to you my wise and beautiful wife. As
usual, you continue to amaze me! You are the 2013 Bracket
Queen.. Congratulations to you. And since it wasn't me to
win, I'm most happy the top prize goes to you.
To the rest of the field: Mark "The Oracle" Vetter knew it
was over from the beginning...little did I understand that
it was my own wife, a rookie to the bracket selection
process that would be at the top come the end this year and
not me :-(
And to think, Rand and I encouraged her to join our Derek
Smackdown this year.
And doggone it, even the Derek-mister ended up nearer the
top than my own, well studied and analyzed selections.
Next year, I'm going to use my wife's process: "Oh, I like
this team"; "Oh, I like that part of the country (Florida)";
"No, I don't like them."....And do click, click, click -
complete my bracket is less than 5 minutes.. :-)
Once again, CONGRATULATIONS TO ANN VETTER... YOU ROCK MY LOVE!
Mark "Not the Better" Vetter
Congratulations!! I concede. I would have done it earlier, but I was waiting to see if I also had to concede to Derek. Thankfully, I won't have to do that this year...like I've had to do in the past. Enjoy your win, and all the prizes that will be coming your way over the year. If the deliveries don't start by next week, be sure to call Rand often!
The Ol' concession
I had so much hope this year. One of my mistakes was
thinking the Big 12 would fare well. They didn't even show up
in the sweet 16.
It was still very fun fantasizing about holding the golden
trophy and rubbing the Simmons clan nose in my glory.
Ann congratulations in you well deserved honor. Did you pick
your teams by your favorite color? I'm sure your story is
that you researched and got a little inside info from the
basketball gods because nobody is just lucky.
Can't wait until September to put the fantasy league
together. Let's eat Ann's lunch in the fall
Ann you're tha woman, the best to pick a bracket evers.....
Derek you still suck worse than me :) Oh the agony of
defeat, I correctly assumed KU would let me down, but took a
misstep thinking any team from Florida could hold it
together to the end. Till next year, thank you Rand!!
Ann, thou art the greatest at picking bracket winners........Derek, again, you suck, but not as much as I.
I have no chance to catch you..........I'm sure you cheated in some way, shape, or form.
El Grade Burrito was very close to becoming the first to accomplish the 4-pete.
My bracket sucked, but it was still better than Mike's.........LMAO
What a crazy ride it has been. My alma mater nearly made it to the final game.....go Shocks!!!
adieu my friends....
Scott "I really, really suck" McLoughlin
Dated March 25, 2013: An Historically Early Concession Letter
I’m out. After 2 rounds. A. Vetter is already Better than I can hope to be. A real Derek-esque performance on my part.
I won’t finish last. Small comfort: I’ll beat a dog and Kate, who must still be drinking the hair of that dog that bit her* as she was making her picks.
(* Hair of the dog: An alcoholic drink taken to make you feel better after drinking too much alcohol the night before.)
What’s truly sad, though, is that yet again we’re left again with the same old big-school bullies to hash it out for the championship. Michigan State. Ohio State. Puke, er, Duke. Arizona. Kansas (yeah, you Buzzards too). Michigan. Florida. Syracuse. Miami (new bullies in the tourney but thugs nonetheless). Indiana (good-Knight, not them again). Louisville and Slick Rick.
I mean, really, what the heck is an FGCU? And while it would be fun, it’d be a real Shocker if Wichita State, La Salle, Oregon, or even Marquette was to win it all; I wouldn’t bet more than a concession letter on any of them.
Just once, I’d like to see a non-traditional team win the tournament. A Gonzaga, Butler, or Creighton. A St. Louis or St. Mary’s. An Ivy League school! A K-State, I-State or CO-State.
My Colorado Buffs (sigh).
Anyway, congratulations to whoever wins the tournament. As for me: Hope to see you next year. … Unless the unthinkable happens …
“The horror. The horror.”
- Col. Kurtz
To Whomever won,
You have mental superiority over all of us... In picking collage basketball. But that doesn't mean you have superiority in anything else. Just consider that.
David "Memphis Man" McFarlane
I bow down to you in your obvious basketball picking greatness. It is clear that you took all the rookie luck away from my brother, the dog, and me. However, This year I am young and foolish. I have gained the wisdom of picking college basketball.
I will bide my time on the bottom of the standings, and then when my plan is complete I will rise. I have been to the mountaintop, and have seen the promise land.